I’ve been off social media for about four or five weeks, and what’s magical about this experience is how you experience the world and the news cycle when you’re not constantly picking up your phone for a dopamine hit. It’s also an incredible way to see who gives a fuck about you enough to make an effort to text or call and who you give a fuck about enough to make an effort to text or call. Also, if there’s news to know about, trust me that you don’t have to go to Twitter to find out. You just will.
I’ve been going into the office more often lately because, despite the many benefits of working from home, WFH life’s just not working for me. I need the energy exchange — from human beings who don’t sell me cat food or samosas. I need the exercise. The office has snacks and pretty good coffee, and if I plan it right, often an old-school lunch date with friends who work nearby. I’m starting to get good at this job and career pivot, and I am just ready to reclaim parts of life BC that felt really good.
Mid-day, my phone pinged a bunch, distracting me. I checked Messages, What’s App and Messenger, and all had some version of the same: Tina Turner dead at 83. My heart sank. Why do some celebrity deaths hit harder than others? Was it seeing Angela Bassett’s amazing performance in the 1993 TT biopic, What’s Love Got to Do with It? and getting the story of Tina surviving so much and finding spirit and success on her own? Or was it watching TT in the actual music video for that song with that title on every Video Hits and top hits countdown in the 80s? Tina, in her beefy denim jacket, leather skirt, black pantyhose, stilettos and big hair, strutting down a gritty streetscape, just stays with you.
Cycling home from the office (for those who don’t know, my bike is named after another legend, Donna Summer), I recalled seeing Tina Turner performing on what may have been her last tour. Chatting with Rasheed, I mentioned that I was so profoundly impacted by her after that show that I wrote a blog post about it for the website I was an editor at back then: Sweetmama.ca. Something about how she thanked her team stood out. “Doesn’t everyone do that at a concert,” Rasheed asked. “No,” I was firm in the memory, “This was different. It left a mark.”
So I dug through the recesses of the internet and found that post. Wow, my writing was pretty rough back then. It’s also a reminder of how much I’ve grown as a human being in the world. For any burgeoning artists out there, this is the IRL version of “If you want something bad enough, you have to be willing to suck at it for a good long time.” Keep going. Keep making your art. And stop giving a fuck about what others will think. Your confidence and your skill level will improve the more you just DO THE THING. (Also, very few writers ever think of themselves as “good.” The self-flagellation is part of the process, haha.)
But I digress. Here’s my ancient-in-internet-years, unedited write-up on the legend that is Tina Turner. I even had a bullet points version of this printed out and pinned in my desk area for years!
Sweetmamas We Love: What Tina Taught Me
Monday, Dec 15, 2008
Friday night, my buddy Elise (our Marketing and Events Coordinator) and I had the great pleasure of seeing Tina Turner live in concert. My husband was surly about it all day. "I'm a bigger Tina Turner fan than you! I should be the one going!" Yet when the extra ticket came up, he chose making pizza and playing Lego Star Wars on the Wii with our son over the concert. (And that's why I love him.) So I called Elise (she fit the criteria of childless -- meaning available in a flash -- and fabulously fun), grabbed my three other girlfriends and headed to the show.
The thing is -- EVERYONE is a Tina Turner fan. There is no way you could go to this show and not be struck by her grace, her gift and her spirit. After the show, we could not stop gushing about Tina. Here's what we took away from our unbelievable, once-in-a-lifetime experience:
1. You are never too old for stilettos and a mini skirt -- if you take pride in yourself. Oh Stacey and Clinton may have their signs that say, "No mini skirts after 35," but they are not talking about Tina. Tina is 69, shakin' her thang in sequins and Louboutins -- and looking hawt! She made me want to go to the gym, pronto.
2. You can be a good mama AND have a solid career. Tina has two kids of her own (and, according to Wikipedia, she's also the adoptive mother of two of Ike's kids from other relationships). I believe she's even a grandmother. Can you imagine Tina being your grandma? That would be all kinds of awesome.
3. Be good to your people. Tina stopped the show to introduce not only the members of her band and her dancers, but also her lighting and stage crew -- each person by name with 20,000 strangers cheering for their hard work to make the show happen. Then, to top it off, she rolled credits at the end of the show to reinforce her gratitude and recognition. Amazing. It stood out.
4. Never underestimate the power of a good tease. Oh we all knew "Proud Mary" was coming, but Tina really dragged it out until we were practically begging for it. I must remember that in my every day...
5. Class is something that comes from within. Tina/Anna Mae came from humble beginnings. Stardom has not diminished her ability to stay centred, nor to be gracious, kind and friendly. "I really enjoyed you enjoying me," she said humbly to the crowd.
6. There are some things only Tina can pull off. Telling (I'm guesstimating) 8000 men you want them to "give it to you real hard," and then getting them to shout out, "What's love got to do, got to do with it." Tina alone. Coming out in full Mad Max regalia, including that Clingon wig and having people think you kick ass? Seulement Tina. Wearing that much sequins? Only Tina. Getting 20K people to shout "Nutbush?" Yep, just Tina. She's simply the best.